Angry fat men are not delightful to deal with

'Nuff said.

High tea @ The Lanesborough

Best cakes and scones I've had at a high tea so far... I also introduced my parents to clotted cream :)

Speakers' corner

Dad: "I was going to speak at Speakers' Corner, but there was a looong queue. Didn't have time to wait because I had to meet you."
Me: "That's ok Dad, I'll book you a slot for next weekend."

It was quite a surprise when we got out of high tea around 6pm, and Speakers' Corner at Hyde Park was still going strong. I've always wanted to hear the ranters :) Public speaking is not my best ability. In fact, I had to do a presentation last week to a whole bunch of HR people. I swear, I could hear crickets scratching at the end of it :P So I was impressed to see such a large crowd gather to hear what a total random stranger had to say.

That is... until I realised, I couldn't understand a word of what was being said :P Strangely, the ones drawing a crowd were speaking in Arabic. I asked someone for a translation, and was told, "This man is from Egypt. He is saying, Egypt is the best country. Better than all the other Arabic countries". Hrm. Fairly mundane topic, but I guess that would explain why there were a lot of Arabic men arguing with him. I was hoping for something a little more controversial, like about the conflicts in Iran or Iraq.

The only English speaker I could hear, was ranting about Jesus. What's new eh?

So, kinda disappointed by Speakers' Corner, but at least now I can mark it as "done" on my Rondon to-do list.

Heritage

One of the positive things that have come out of my parents' visit, is the tidbits of info I get fed about my family history. My grandma has two names. My grandma's brother had three wives, two of whom were jealous of my grandma. My grandpa's brother cheated the family with dealings on the chicken farm. My Dad sold eggs from the chicken farm. My Dad was born in a hut. My great-grandpa owned a small grocer shop but was stingy. Everything was lost during the war. Great-grandpa was an opium addict. My grandma pawned her jewellery to afford food for the family. My grandma caned anyone who slept in past 8am. My grandpa caned anyone who didn't do well at school.

Different times.

I love my parents, and I love having them here, and we joke lots (loudly, in Chinese, mainly about our bowel movements, the Pope, and the Queen). However, at the same time, they're driving me nuts :P NUTS, I tell you, NUTS. Yet, I look at them, and realise that so much of who I am comes from who they are, and how they've been brought up. So if you don't like anything about me, you know who to blame ;)

I think a lot about what sort of person my niece will grow up to be. Sadly, I don't think she'll get the same exposure to my culture and heritage. Not saying I'm an expert on all things oriental, if anything I feel like I've missed out on a lot. But at least I had a chance to experience some of it growing up - temple visits, ancestry worship, gods & goddesses 101, oriental festivals... It'll be interesting to see the next generation of my clan grow up anyway.

Different times.

Cheating

From this:
(Turnmills membership photo 2006)

To this:
(Simpsonize Me)

Hehehe... So ok, the original pic of me is a year old. I found myself adjusting and picking features until I looked like how I wanted to look, and not necessarily like how I look like right now *sigh* It's a little soul crushing that it's possible for me to look hotter in a 2D cartoon than in real life :P

Maybe I should add a barrel to my wardrobe...

Thanks Lil, for the Friday link!

Size queen

I don't get it. Pretty it may be, but do I really want to watch "two movies back-to-back" on a 2-inch screen? :/ I'm squinty enough as an oriental...

I'll stick to my 15.4 inch MBP display :P

Guess how much?

I hate having cravings. Especially expensive ones. Guess how much these 6 teeny weeny pieces of salmon and tuna sashimi set me back:

£10.30

YUP. 10+ squids. I couldn't help but convert to Aussie dollars. That's about AU$25. For AU$25, I could have a fcking feast at Makoto sushi train in Sydnery with my cuz. It'd be a lot better too. Don't get me wrong, Japan Centre's Toku restaurant is great. It's as close as I'm going to get to decent Jap without going one level up to fine dining. Only, it's so dang expensive for what you get. I also ordered Umeshu (5 squids for 50ml!) and green tea ice-cream (stingy 1 scoop given only). Total of bill would've been about 20 squids IF I didn't have some discount card stamps with me. I still ended up paying about 12 squids. Dang it. It really bothers me. I don't understand why good Japanese is so hard to find here. Gawd I miss Ichi-ban Boshi. MMmm, unagi zara... *lustful sigh*

MEN

Apparently, when guys are 20-something, all they can think about is sex. A short skirt and tights, that's all it takes. All they want to do is, have sex. So that's why it's ok for 20-something year old guys to cheat. Because at that age, guys just want to have sex. It doesn't mean anything when they cheat, cause it's _just_ sex. Then suddenly, when a guy hits 30-something, all they want is long term commitment. So cheating isn't ok anymore. One day it's fine to cheat, the next day it's against his principles.

MEN :P

It's NEVER ok to cheat!! IMHO :P Yer can look, but just make sure you know which beehive to get your honey from. Is that a bad analogy? :) I swear, the number of times I've had guys try and explain to me the whole "guys just want to get into your pants" mindset, and I still don't understand it. What's the big deal? Can't we just talk? :P Guys - you're sooo one dimensional sometimes! And demanding.

I can't remember what I was talking about one day with a couple of blokey mates, but the topic was enough to incense me to declare, "THAT'S IT. I'M DOING A SURVEY!"

Bush or no bush?

From bars and clubs, to Ibiza parties, to random drinks with random guys. Months of hard research - the answer is unanimous...

No bush.

What. Don't act surprised. YOU expected it all along. YOU can't fool me. I've had one guy tell me he'd turn away a hot chick if he found out she had bush!

There _is_ a (very) small contingent that will say bush. However, their logic behind it is that they don't want to feel like a paedophile :P

MEN :P

Reverting to childhood

6:25am (5 mins of snooze time left before my alarm goes off)
Dad: "Girlie, wake up"
Me: "Mmmffffmmm"
Dad: "Mum, you better wake Girlie up"
Mum kicks me
Me: "MMMMMMPPHFHFFFFF"
Dad: "Girlie, it's time to wake up!"
Me: "YES DAD"

I'm 7 years old again. It's time to wake up and get ready for school... At least this time round, I can avoid the yucky half-boiled egg slime for brekky :)

Daliborus

I think what I loved most about working for PwC Consulting, was the people I met. It definitely wasn't the work. It definitely wasn't the crap salary. It was the great people. One faithful night in Tampa, I couldn't sleep, so I did the usual - I baked. I baked a looooot of cakes when I was in Tampa. But this one was special. This one was a chocolate mud for Anna's birthday :) This one, won me Daliborus' eternal friendship *lol* Thus began my education on The Man Show, hippos versus elephants and rhinos, the joys of a good booty, and... erm, other stuff that can't be mentioned on my blog *lol*

Over the years, there are only a few left that I still see from the "good ol' days". And if I'm really lucky, I get a visit from one in Rondon :) If I'm REALLY REALLY lucky, I even get not one, but TWO jars of his Mum's homemade apricot jam! :D *drooool* Guess what I had for brekky this morning, Daliborus? ;)

M&D

A continental brekky at Le Pain

M&D flew in last night, and although I spent the first night on the sofa bed, Mum kept insisting I sleep in the same room. So here I am. I think the last time I slept in the same room as my parents, I was about 12 years old. I feel 12 again :)

Only this time, I'm prepared...

1 x pair foam earplugs!

My Dad's in denial and blames my Mum. The truth is, he's been snoring up a thunderstorm for the past few decades! As males get older, the snoring gets louder. Weird but undeniable truth of life. Chubby never use to snore when he was a puppy :P

It's funny being in Rondon with them. It doesn't matter that I'm 28 years old, I still want to do _everything_ right by them. I'm worried about what to feed them, what to show them, where to take them, whether my room's clean enough for them! I'm a slob. I'll admit it. I wallow in my own mess. Even now, the mess hasn't really been cleaned, it's just been shoved under the bed *grin* BUT, I did vacuum and mop AND, most hated chore of all - clean the toilet! No complaints from M&D about my cleanliness so far *phew*

I did try and broach the topic of my latest tattoo with my Dad.
Me: "Mum, did you tell Dad about my tattoo?"
(Yeah, I've been too chicken to tell my Dad. I was hoping my Mum would do it for me :P )
Mum: "No, but your brother started talking about it, and I gave him looks. So I think Dad knows, but he didn't ask."
Me: "Oh..."
*Later on*
Me: "Dad, erm, do you want to see my new tattoo?"
Dad: "YOU ARE COVERED WITH TATTOOS! DON'T KNOW WHY YOU GET THEM!"
Me: "It's only two!"
I've taken Dad's response as a sign of, "better not go there" :P

Time to test those earplugs out :)

Cowgirls

Hehehe...

Happy 0.375 year anniversary, U&W! ;)

Long weekend

For the first time in a week, the sun finally peeked through, and the rain clouds disappeared. Thank gawd. I was about to spend the day outdoors at SW4 :P As much as I love Paul van Dyk, it really wouldn't have been that much fun if it was raining on me during his set. The pic above is of the massive line to get into SW4. Single file, people pretty much circled the park to get into one entrance. I think I stood in it for at least half an hour!

SW4 reminded me a lot of my last Field Day actually :) Just with a lot more DJs.

Bosom buddies *grin*

Wazzz with the munchies:

Bonding with my tattoo buddy:

Dodgy orientals

I love my "Fong Jaow" ("Phoenix Claws", the fancy name for "chicken feet"). It's funny when I go to dim sum (the British name for yum cha) with a caucasian crowd, and they always make fun of "Fong Jaow". It's like the biggest challenge to eat something like chicken feet. But I love it. Fresh from a steamer. This though, I wouldn't touch... Chicken feet preserved in gawd knows what, vacuum packed in plastic, and sold in an oriental supermarket as a snack.

*Bleargh* It looks so bad:

It's also quite a worry when you're eating at a restaurant and the menu plugs one of its selling points as, "Excellent Hygiene". Excellent hygiene? Shouldn't ALL restaurants have excellent hygiene? Is it something that needs to be advertised? Should I be worried that the restaurant has to be explicit about its hygiene standards?!?

Well, all I can say is, I had a really bad tummy the next day :P It could've been the prawns, it could've been the chilli oil. At least I can rest assured that it wasn't because of poor hygiene :P

Youth crime

Youth crime is pretty scary in the UK. It's scary to see headlines like, "11 year old shot. First pictures," on evening papers. It's scary to read about young teens getting killed in their own bed. If you're not safe in your own home, where can you go?

An 11 year old, walking home after playing football, gets shot by a youth aged 13-15. When I was 13... I was worried about doing well in school, making friends, gawd knows what other trivial sht. Where does a 13 year old get a gun from? Why would a 13 year old think of shooting someone? It scares the bejeezus out of me.

Kids in the UK, they're... different. It makes me feel old to say, "Kids these days, have no respect". Not for their elders, not for themselves, not for anyone else. A lady sat down next to me on the bus the other day. She pulled out her mobile and called her mum ("HIYA MUM! ARE YOU OWRIGH?"). From her very loud conversation, I found out that she herself was a mother of a teenage daughter. The daughter wizzes with the toilet door open. Doesn't wash her hands. Goes into the kitchen, touches everything and makes herself tea and a snack. Apparently she does this all the time.

When I was young, if I ever did anything like that, my Mum would've smacked the crap out of me. Although my Dad never laid a hand on me, my Mum was never afraid to pull out the rattan feather duster for a good caning. If I did something to deserve it. My brothers apparently use to get chilli rubbed onto their lips. Kinda backfired, my second brother grew up to be a bigger chilli addict than I am :P

The lady next to me, all she did was, tell her daughter that she should wash her hands after coming out of the toilet. Her daughter apparently gave her "a look" and ignored her. End of disciplining.

o_O

I'm not trying to enforce child abuse :P But... Come on!!! Instill some fear into your kids :P

The lady next to me then spent the rest of the trip justifying to her own mother why she had to "have a word" with her daughter about hygiene.

O_O

How do kids grow up like that? I just have no idea. I really don't want kids. Way too much time and effort to invest in kids. Especially when they turn out like that.

Star Trekking

Approximately 689 minutes later, one thing's for sure - Captain Kirk's waistline definitely expands with every movie :) Have to admit, he was pretty sharp looking in the original Motion Picture. Definitely not as sharp by Star Trek 7, especially up against Jean-Luc Picard! Now I understand why Ula had a thing for Picard ;) *grin*

You know, I'm sure the question's been asked many times before, but I'm new to this. Why-o-why, did they remove seatbelts from spaceships? They have warp drives, they have transporters, they have impulse power... But something as simple as seatbelts? Nope. Or just _anything_ that keeps them in their seat? Nope. I haven't watched a single movie out of the 7 yet, that hasn't had a scene where crew members are thrown around the bridge!

The whole reason I started watching the Star Trek movies is because I really thought Futurama's "Where No Fan Has Gone Before" episode was one of the best. It's probably too early to make Star Trek judgement calls since I have another 3 more movies to finish watching *groan* Getting there. But out of all the movies starring the original Star Trek crew, I'd have to say "Wrath of Khan" is the best. With Khan's moobies deserving a special mention. Followed by "Search for Spock". "The Voyage Home" is hilarious just cause Chekov really does keep saying, "nuclear wessels" (as piss-taken in Futurama) *grin* And I burst out laughing when Uhura did the fan dance in "The Final Frontier" :)

It's actually a lot less painful than I expected watching the Star Trek movies. I was tempted to delete all of them after watching the first one, which was just terrible. I'm glad I stuck it out :)

Some friendships...

... will always pick up where they left off.

Over time, the family of funny faces just gets bigger :)

I miss those days of $5 steaks, pool at Sharkies, wedges at Roofbar, lazy brunches and coffees. Quality time with mates *sigh* I can even remember my first D&M with KC about 11 years ago. We were on our way to the Matthews building :)

Good luck in NYC guys! Book me in for your couch (when you get one *grin*)!

Hey Wazzz

Come and get it *grin*

Needless to say, Wazzz didn't want to :P

MIA: 1 Cossack dancer

6 years out of sight and sound, and nothing's changed! You still banter like an old woman *grin* Glad we got to meet up mate! Even if you are a lousy date!! ;)

AP with his very girly "tulip" dessert:

LS said it best:

"Most people shouldn't drink and drive, you shouldn't drink and communicate :)"

Mm, does it count if I actually figured out that 1am Rondon time equates to 10am Sydnery time, and therefore, it was fine to send you a drunken message? :) I felt it was important to express my thanks for the RAM! *grin* I didn't think it was as important to spell correctly ;)

I really should get my internet and phone taken off me after a couple of beers though. Geez. There have been some doozies these past couple of weeks. I remember running up to a sports car filled with young arrogant pups (YAP) on Saturday night. It had wing doors, so it was either a Lamborghini, or a souped up Supra *lol* I couldn't tell :P

Me: "What do you do for a living?"
YAP: "Property development, rental estates..."
Me: "How much do you earn?"
YAP: "43,000 pounds per MONTH."
Me: (Dubious) "Do your parents have a lot of money??"
YAP: "No man! I'm a self-made millionaire!"

This boy, looked about 16 years old! Complete with giant diamond bling in his ear. Although, that could've been a cubic zirconia :P I think he was having me on :P No, I didn't climb into the car. I ran off and joined my mates to catch the N18 bus home :) All those Ferrari drivers out there, better watch out for the curious drunken oriental. I want answers!