Sunday, September 13, 2009

Stupid <3

There is and there isn't a guy. He flits very randomly in and out of my life with very little notice. He flits in, we get on like a house on fire. He flits out, and a faint imprint is left behind...

The unspoken rules of "No Strings Attached" (for the BASIC geek in you):
10 Well, you don't get attached for starters
20 You don't ever contemplate the possibility of a future together
30 GOTO 10

(Most people remember their first program as "Hello World". Mine was a green Logo turtle which made an equilateral triangle :) )

Problem is, each time it happens, the imprint gets deeper. Here's where it fcking sucks to be a girl. Most guys I've spoken to about this, can just cut off emotionally. They put it away. Emotions out of sight are out of mind.

As a girl, I didn't care at the start. It's just fun. It's nothing serious. Think of the baggage. BIG BIIIIG baggage.

The tumbleweed sweeps by. It's still fun. We get along *so* well. But hell, different cities, different priorities, it's never going to work. Still thinking of the baggage.

The dust storm rolls in. I start thinking "what if". What if he moves back to this city. He's always talking about coming back. We click. We spark. That's why I forgave when he said sorry. It took a lot for him to say sorry, and I really appreciated it. Now I'm starting to wonder if he thinks about me too. Now the baggage is BIG, but maybe it's not soo BIIIIG if things ever got serious.

Dangerous thoughts. That's unspoken line 20 broken.

Dang hard to resist.
It's _especially_ hard to resist when he's been training lots and seriously has the body of a Greek god *grin* It's dang near impossible to resist when someone you want, wants you back.

So now I'm just waiting for the hurricane to hit. I won't know when it'll be.

Stupid heart. I should just cut the strings now.

Bonus: Since I'm being nostalgic, here's pics from the Invader exhibition recently held at Lazarides:


Kev said...

Must be those pull ups :)

reenie said...

I have fond memories of those pull ups *grin* You should note it down in your book of tricks, Kev ;)