Sidetracked

"Asian in Sydnery" just doesn't have the same ring. However, here's what I'm thinking tonight.
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I'd like to think that I'm pretty open minded and non-prejudicial. I looooves my curries. I looooves my garlic and onions. I looooves my booze. All this must reek the next day, and I wouldn't know unless you tells me.

But FFS, how can it be that bad that even though my nose is against an open window and there's half a metre between us - I CAN SMELL YOU ENOUGH THAT I HAVE TO STOP BREATHING?!?

I'm sorry to say, the stinky curry stereotype is true. You want to know how tolerant I am? I stayed in my seat until the next stop 15 mins away. *15mins* of inescapable body odour without a dirty look or word.

The other gripe I have, and I'm saying this because it seriously vexes me - total fatties on trains. I'm talking about fat to the point of I understand why it's called morbid. I'm not apologising for thinking this either. You know what? I eat. I loooooves my food. If you look at my genetic history, my father's side is filled with pot bellies, size 16-20, zipper club triple bypasses, bowel problems, secret diabetes and hypertension. My point is, in our time and generation - we know better. I've learnt from it and I don't eat lard as an everyday food like my Dad used to (yes, it's nommy). You don't fcking eat to the point where you waddle. You don't fcking eat to the point where a seat for three is a competition between me and two fatties.

Yes, that's what my everyday mornings on the train are like.

An evil glance at the two fatties who take up a seat for three. For this I have to stand for 40mins. I seriously *tried* once to squeeze in between two fatties. I had to stand up again when my butt obviously couldn't fit. You know what's bad?!? The fatties _didn't bother_ to make space at all. No shuffling over. All I needed was an inch or two either side. To which I'm internalising, "fat fckers". Gawd forgive me for thinking bad thoughts about humankind.

Can't wait for those heart attacks to happen :P

Yes. I think you _should_ feel bad about taking up an extra half seat. I fcking run when I *hates* running. At least try to take some pride in your body, especially when you're a fatty at <= my age.

To be fair, I'm not a morning person.

Don't even get me started on fatties on planes.