Friday, January 11, 2008

An experiment (Part Deux)

Nothing comes from nothing. I'd read this passage the same night I decided to empty a bottle of good red:
Goodwin next has a subchapter heading called "The Loner Theory." He quotes an interpretation by historian Gilman Ostrander:

"Alcoholism is basically a disease of individualism. It afflicts people who from early childhood develop a strong sense of being psychologically alone and on their own in the world. This solitary outlook prevents them from gaining emotional release through associations with other people, but they find they can get this emotional release by drinking. So they become dependent on alcohol in the way other people are dependent on their social relationships with friends and relatives."

I thought about it pretty hard.
The passage made me wonder if it was that easy to substitute friendships with lots of alcohol. I thought about the times when, without fail, I'd always turn towards alcohol. I thought back to when I travelled to Croatia. For the first time, I was in a foreign country, without any grasp of the language, and on my own. I felt people watching me, some even took photos (I called them the SSCWTSPAC - Secret Society of Croatians Who Take Surprise Photos of Asian Chicks) :P

That's when I started having an espresso for brekky and a beer for lunch. I started to relax after the first beer, I'd go for a swim in the Adriatic sea, I'd pop out for another beer while I sunned myself. Pretty soon, I didn't care who was staring. By the time I got home to Sydnery, I remember being able to down beers faster than a couple of giant Kiwis. It's kinda true - alcohol does provide an emotional release. On my own, I'd rather drink and be happy, than make friends and be happy. It's a lot faster and it's a lot easier.

NYE, on my own in the world with a bottle of red, wasn't that bad an experience. Puking a bottle of red, definitely was :P I couldn't do it every night. It's been 10 days and I still can't drink a glass of red. So, good news everyone, I'm definitely not swapping my friends in for the bottle! Yet, anyway. Just make sure I don't spend too much time alone with your alcohol :P

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