Monday, July 09, 2007

Stranger danger

What is it about me that attracts the weirdos? In clubs, in bars, in cafes, on the street, and now, in _airports_! Why is it never the good looking hunka muffin that approaches me with a corny opening line? No. I get the weird, old, wrinkly, googly-eyed grandpa. It's _always_ the grandpa.

I'm minding my own business at Schipol airport in Amsterdam when the googly-eyed grandpa (G-E G) approaches me and starts speaking in FRENCH. What on earth would possess anyone to speak French to an oriental in a DUTCH city? Actually, I've always wanted a guy who could speak French, but I guess I should be more specific about what I ask for. Please add "non-creepy" to my list of requirements. After grandpa had figured out I spoke English:
G-E G: "Is this your first time in Holland?"
Me: "No."
G-E G: "Your second time?"
Me: "No. I have friends here."
G-E G: "Oh. What's your name?"
Me: "Sarah."
G-E G: "Oh! Do you know where the name Sarah comes from?"
Me: "No." (Internal *sigh*... and I don't really care. I'm just making sht up to humour you...)
G-E G: "Sarah, is Abraham's wife! You know Abraham? It comes from Catholicism."
Me: "Yes." (Why are you talking to me?)
G-E G: "Are you Catholic? Or Muslim? What are you?"
Me: "No. I'm nothing."
G-E G: "Well, Sarah is Abraham's wife. Shall we go somewhere to talk?"
Me: "NO!" (You MORON!)

... and I walk away. The problem is, my parents brought me up to be polite and well-mannered to anyone. When really, it would've been more useful for my parents to have taught me how to cuss like a pirate :P It's "wrong" in our society for me to be rude to older people,
"respect your elders" and all that crap. However, I don't care how senile grandpa is, he has NO RIGHT to prey on girls 50 years his junior. _That's_ wrong!

Would you believe the googly-eyed grandpa crept up on me AGAIN about 5 minutes later??
G-E G: "Excuse me..."
Me: "GAAAAAAAAAAAH!" (totally freaked and caught by surprise)
G-E G: "Sorry! Bye..." (walks away real fast)

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