Thursday, September 04, 2008

Why did Reenie cross the road?

Day 3 in California. I've been busted by a COP. I have a court date. I fcking kid you not.

I'm at a major road. I look left, I look right. There aren't any pedestrian crossings. I'd have to cross at least another two intersections to get to the other side if I wanted to follow the right way. So I took a chance. After all, there's an island in the middle of the major road.

I bolt across to the island.

*WOOOB* *WOOOB*... Cop car pulls up.
Coppa: "Maam, wait for me on the other side."
Me: "Errr, ok."

Busted *sigh*

Coppa: "I saw you looking. I saw you thinking about it. I saw you looking at the crosswalk."
Me: *thinking* "You fcking bastard, you were waiting for me."
Me: *out loud* "Sorry? What's a crosswalk? What do you mean?"
Me: "I'm Australian and I live in London, here's my passport."
Coppa: "You speak really good English, are you sure?"
Me: *thinking* "Fcking retardo"
Me: "Here's my passport. Look, I've been in this country for THREE DAYS. I didn't know it was illegal to jaywalk."
Coppa: "Maam, I'm not a passport checker."

I kid you not :P

Coppa: "Maam, you don't know this, but lots of people have been killed on this road."
Me: "Then build a freaking FOOTBRIDGE. *I* would've used a footbridge."
Coppa: "Maam, we don't have the money. Until the state of California has the money, we can't do this."
Me: "You're giving me a freaking fine right now!!! Use the dang money to BUILD A FOOTBRIDGE."

And so on it goes. I have to be in court on the 28th October. I don't think I'm going to make it :P Fcking rednecks.


PeeDz said...

BAHAHA. Haven't you seen Beverly Hills cop? Jaywalkin way illegal.. sifnt know :P

reenie said...

I'm sure jaywalking is illegal in a lot of places, but the fact that the cop wouldn't believe I'm a tourist and gave me a freaking TICKET for JAYWALKING of all things - Gaaaaaah!!!!

Beckster said...

WTF?! Californians get tickets for jaywalking?! Clearly between suntanning and drinking beer their cops do not have enough to do.

On another note - Reenie if you're in Cali you're a hop and skip away from NYC. COME VISIT. The bon chon chicken wings beckon you :)